Better than S-E-X

I remember at the ripe age of 8 overhearing a somewhat scandalous conversation between my Uncle and my Mom. Or at least scandalous to the ears of a pre-pubescent child.

My uncle had just bought some brownies from a bakery and they claimed to be better than... you guessed it... sex. My mom took a bite of the brownie and...

they laughed. I remember her saying something along the lines of "I don't know what type of sex they're having." Implying that nothing is better than sex. Was it disturbing to know that my parents were still banging it out?

YES!

But that's not the point of that story. Bear with me. We will get to the point.

The second time I came across the phrase 'better than sex' was when I stumbled upon my aunt's mascara. Beauty companies simply cannot help but turn innuendos into products. And of course, I applaud them for it. Was the mascara better than sex? I have no idea I haven't used it yet.

But do you, my dearest reader, want to know what IS in fact better than sex?

Applause.

Validation.

Achievement.

Winning.

Call me a cold bitch but I will take a trophy over an orgasm any day.

So when I saw that Reaper of The Wicked was #1 in the Femme Fatale category I fucking creamed my pants. What can I say...

I live for the applause.